So Close
by Must-Have-Books92
Summary: They have a chance to be together again. Will they take it?


So Close

(Bella's POV)

I couldn't believe he was here. In the same room. Practically right next to me. I plastered on a smile I'd been faking for two years and clapped as my father, Charlie Swan, walked in with his new wife, Sue used-to-be Clearwater. I had been one of Sue's bridesmaids, along with her daughter, the Maid of Honor, Leah. I glance to my right to look at him again. He was clapping as well, but he wasn't smiling. As if he felt my stare, he looked at me. I barely suppressed my gasp. I had seen him as I walked down the aisle, but didn't get a very good look. Now I did.

He looked the same as he did when I left two years ago. Piercing green eyes, disheveled bronze hair, strong jaw, and a lean, but muscular body. I felt myself tremble a little as I was caught in his unwavering gaze. Tears sprung to my eyes, and then I hastily looked away so that he wouldn't see. I looked back at Charlie and Sue, who were spinning happily on the dance floor. This time my smile was genuine. My father had been hung-up on my mother for far too long. I liked Sue. She made him happy. Charlie looked at me and his smile grew. He kissed Sue and then walked over to me, while Sue's son took Charlie's place.

"Hey, kid. I don't know if I told you or not, but you look beautiful," Charlie said as he approached me. I smiled and took his hand. We started dancing and Charlie noticed my absentmindedness. "Hey, you okay?" he asked, and I looked up at him and smiled. I put on my fake smile and lied like I had been for the past year and a half.

"I'm fine, Dad. I'm really happy for you," I said, then leaned up and kissed him on the cheek. He blushed and smiled again. I'd never seen him smile so much.

"Thanks. Sue's amazing. I—" but he didn't finish, because just then, a smooth voice interrupted.

"Mind if I cut in?" he asked, and I froze. Hearing his voice brought back all those memories I'd blocked for so long. Us laughing, kissing, holding hands. Charlie seemed unsure, and he sensed my hesitation. But, I needed to be strong. I breathed deeply and put on my cool, collected mask.

"Not at all," I said, turning around to face him. Seeing him this close my breath catch, but I refused to let anything show. He took Charlie's place as a new song started.

_You're in my arms_

_And all the world is calm_

_The music playing on for only two_

_So close together_

_And when I'm with you_

_So close to feeling alive_

"You look wonderful, Bella," he said, his voice smooth on my skin like silk.

"Thank you, Edward. You look very nice yourself," I replied. I couldn't let him see how much I wanted to be close with him, how much I'd just wanted to pick up the phone and call him these past two years.

"How've you been doing?" he asked. I looked at him, and all I saw on his face was sadness.

"I've been doing well. And you?" I asked. He nodded.

"I've been surviving," he stated. I really looked at him this time, and saw the pain he'd been living with these past years. It took my breath away.

_A life goes by_

_Romantic dreams must die_

_S I bid mine goodbye and never knew_

_So close was waiting, waiting here with you_

_A now forever I know_

_All that I wanted is to hold you_

_So close_

"Are you still in Seattle?" I asked, because it was the only thing I could think to say. I could feel the tears building, my throat closing up. How much had I just simply wanted his arms to be around me again, for him just to hold me?

"Yes, I am. Where're you living?" he asked.

"I'm living in Port Angeles. I'm teaching an English class at the university," I explained. He nodded again.

"It seems you've moved on," he stated. Not harshly, or sadly. Just as if he were stating the weather.

"Not entirely," I said, looking his right in the eye. I let my mask slip away. A few tears ran down my cheek as his eyes widened when he saw the real me. The real me that no one hasn't seen in a while, because when I'm around them, they see the happy me, who isn't really happy at all. Six months after I left, I was so sick of them just wanting me to move on, so I pretended that I had. I got up, went to work, came home, went out with my friends, but never dated. That was one thing I could never do.

"Nor have I," he said, moving one hand to brush the tears from my cheek. I let myself remember the day I'd left.

"_God, Edward! I'm so sick of fighting over the littlest things!" I screamed as I stormed through his apartment as we fought once again over something trivial. _

"_Then why don't you just leave?" he asked, following close behind me. I whirled around to face him, stunned that he would say that. We fought, yes, but he'd never told me to leave. But I didn't see any regret there, just anger. I drew myself up and spoke with a cold voice. _

"_Fine. I will."_

I shook my head to rid myself of the memories. I looked at Edward, who looked as if he'd been remembering that day to.

_So close to reaching_

_That famous happy end_

_Almost believing this one's not pretend _

_Now you're beside me_

_And look how far we've come_

_So far, we are, so close_

"Why didn't you come back, Bella?" he asked, desperation deep in his voice.

"Because you didn't come after me."

* * *

(Edward's POV)

I couldn't believe that she was really here. I'd dreamed about this since the day she'd walked out. Not that I could blame her. I'd said horrible things. She should hate me and move on. But all I saw on her face was emptiness and remorse. And regret. I held her a bit closer, and she didn't seem to mind.

"I didn't know that you wanted me to," I told her. She shook her head.

"Edward, all I wanted, all I want, is you. Now and forever. But it's too late," she said, and I wanted to protest, but she placed her hand over my mouth. "Let's just share this one last dance," she said, and laid her head on my shoulder. I held her body to mine so tightly I was worried she couldn't breath.

_Oh, how could I face the faceless days_

_If I should loose you now_

I felt my tears leak into her hair as hers spilled onto my jacket. I didn't want to let her go, but if she wanted to, I would. I wanted her to be happy, even if I was miserable. I knew the song was coming to and end, but I wished it would never stop.

_We're so close_

_To reaching that famous happy end_

_Almost believing that this one's pretend_

_Let's go on dreaming, though we know we are_

_So close_

_So close_

_And still so far_

The song ended, and she stepped out of my arms. She smiled at me, a sad, regretting smile, then turned and walked away. She was leaving me again, but this time because she wanted to. I watched her until I couldn't see her anymore, and then let a lone tear escape. Bella, my love, my life, had just left me, though this time I didn't think I would be able to live through it. I turned and walked back to my table, and was about to leave when I felt a strong hand on my shoulder.

"I can't believe you were that stupid as to let her go again," I heard Charlie say, and I turned to face him.

"She wanted to go, so I let her," I explained, and wasn't surprised at how lifeless my voice sounded. Charlie laughed.

"Boy, you've got some learning to do. She wants you to chase her again. So why don't you go do it?" he asked. I couldn't believe what I was hearing. This man should hate me, like his daughter. Why didn't he? He must've read the question in my eyes.

"Edward, I love my daughter. I was pissed at you the first time for letting her go. She may have fooled everyone with that happy-act of hers, but not me. I saw how much it was killing her to live life without you, and I realized how much you two meant to each other. I want my daughter to be happy, no matter what. So, why don't you go after her?" he said, then smiled. I smiled back and hugged him. I laughed, the first laugh in two years, and then went after the love of my life.

* * *

(Bella's POV)

I cried as I drove home. I replayed the dance with Edward, remembering how his arms felt around me, how his voice still made me want to sigh, and how more than anything in this world, I just wanted to say how much I loved him. I wanted to be with him, now and forever. I never wanted to leave him again. But I had to. We had to move on from each other. It didn't make it any less painful, though. We couldn't be together. The first time…we were too wrapped up in each other. It wasn't healthy. It's why we couldn't be with each other now.

I knew that I wouldn't ever love anyone else for my whole life. I would always love him, no matter what. I smiled as I thought of all the times we had together.

"_Edward!" I shrieked as he chased me around his apartment. I knew it was pointless. He was faster than I was, and could always catch me. I soon felt his arms wrap around me, and he tackled me to the couch, pinning me between the couch and his body._

"_Now, love, what was I saying before you rudely interrupted me?" he asked, nipping at my neck. _

"_I…I don't remember," I stuttered, losing my train of thought. He laughed. _

"_I do. I was telling you why I loved you. Shall I continue?" he asked. I nodded silently. "I love how you kiss, how you laugh, smile, play, or anything else. You're the most beautiful creature I've ever seen, and I never want to love anyone but you. I don't want to spend my life with anyone but you. I will love you for eternity," he said, and as he spoke, his voice lost his playful tone and grew more earnest. I felt tears well up in my eyes, and I nodded again. _

"_Oh, Edward. I love you so much," I whispered. He bent down and kissed me, and I couldn't remember being more happy than I was at that moment. _I smiled sorrowfully at the memory. I would only have those to remember him by from now on. I played through the memories as I pulled up to my apartment, and was letting the tears fall as I opened my doors.

"You know, you really should lock you doors," I heard a voice say, and my heard snapped up at the sound of his voice. I was shocked to see him standing there, in my living room, as if the past two years hadn't happened.

"What're you doing here?" I asked breathlessly. He walked towards me.

"I made the mistake of not chasing after you once. I didn't want to make it again," he said, and I felt more tears fall as he continued to speak. "Bella, I was an idiotic fool for ever letting you go the first time. You may be able to live without me, but I'm not that strong. I can't even bear to think about you not in my life. I was hollow after you left me, and this time I don't think I'll make it through. So I'm here asking, pleading, begging, for you not to leave me a second time. Bella, I love you with everything I am. Please. Don't make me lose you again." As he finished speaking, he had come closer, and now he was cupping my face in his strong hands. I couldn't' say anything, so all I did was lean up and kiss him with everything I had in me. He kissed me back, even more fiercely, and before I let the happiness overwhelm me, I remembered thinking that I'd been wrong. This was the happiest I'd ever felt in my life.

* * *

**_This was just a little one-shot in my head, because I just love this song. It's "So Close" but Jon McLaughlin. Please leave some reviews._**


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